Life Immitates WTF?

The story you are about to read is true. Only the names have been changed to protect the goobers I work with from massive public humiliation.

Fact #1 - While everyone I work with is over age 21, we all act as if we're about 15.
Fact #2 - Sugar has adverse effects on people, even after puberty.
Fact #3 - Walking while consuming a beverage is rarely a good strategy.

This is a story involving myself, my boss, and three of my goofball co-workers. We'll call them Moe, Shemp, and Larry.

Moe walks down the hall past my office, head tipped back, drinking a Coke from a can. Shemp, unbeknownst to Moe or myself, is rounding the corner walking towards Moe. Directly in front of Larry's office:
1. Moe stumbles, Coke can still lifted above his head.
2. Shemp, seeing the stammering Moe, overreacts and launches himself in freakish cat-like fashion away from Moe and directly into Larry's office.
3. Moe loses his balance and falls sideways into a wall (THUD!)
4. Shemp flys into Larry's office and lands inches from a startled Larry (BOOMF!)
5. Moe bounces off the wall and falls, face first, into Larry's office (WHOMP!)
6. Larry repeats the phrase, "OH MY GOD!" ad infinitium.
7. My boss emerges from his office to investigate.
8. Shemp laughs
9. Moe tries to explain to the boss why he's lying on the floor, covered in cola.
10. The boss says, "Stick to drinking water."
11. Larry says, "And do it at your desk!"
12. I shout from my office, "Can you monkeys keep it to a dull roar? I'm trying to work!"
13. Walking back to his office, the boss says as he walks past, "They ARE monkeys. I'd call them trained monkeys but they haven't got the training."

I'm beginning to think that vying for a promotion would be a mistake. I'd miss all the hijinks.